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As part of an exercise, he looked in the mirror and and met the eyes of a long lost stranger. The eyes looking back surprised him as he met the sadness that lived deeply inside. He had betrayed himself and lost so much of his own self as he spent too many months, maybe years, trying to make his wife love him. Now, gazing deeply into that sadness, he realized how he had betrayed himself.

In a conversation with his friend, he heard a new perspective on the losses he has experienced and what he witnessed searching the despair in those eyes. The betrayal of self caused a painful discovery of how hard he had been on himself; judging and criticizing his weakness, his failures, and every other shoulder of responsiblity that he could burden himself with. He had gone so far away from loving the man he had once been. Reflecting back, his friend saw the sadness as he felt it too, and the sadness was love.

Looking deeply into those eyes, the sadness was not just the loss of what he once remembered of lost dreams no longer to be realized. The sadness was the sadness of the God within himself, his spirit, crying and aching for him to heal and remember who he was and that he was whole; that he was perfect and loved. The all-knowing God within knew him, his self-worth, and wished that he would come back to him Self, to his innocence, to his power. And he cried.